Kajira's (Biographical) Cover Feature Article from Jareeda Magazine

The photo was taken by Chuck Lehnhard in the fall of 1998.
It was also the photo used on the cover of Jareeda.

When Mezdulene approached me to write this article, I was both very honored and very challenged. She asked me to include information that encompasses not only my dancing experiences, but some personal information as well. She said, "write about yourself as a whole person, not just the dancer." I am grateful for this opportunity to share my story with you.

I began dancing at age 4 and 5, when my parents put me into a ballet class. I liked the costumes but I do recall being frightened when an older girl I looked up to began on pointe and she showed me her bloody toes and padding. I think that also frightened my Mom, as shortly after that I was introduced to horseback riding lessons and I immediately quit ballet to pursue that instead.

I have horses in my blood. The horse is my totem animal. I rode constantly, and when my family moved to the more rural area of Petaluma, California, I was able to have my very own ponies. Soon I outgrew their small stature and moved up to horses. I joined a club called the Petaluma Jr. Riding and Driving Club and eventually held all offices from secretary to president.

We were famous in our area for our color guards and precision drill team. I was carrying the American flag when our color guard won Reserve Grand Champion at the Jr. Grand National, held at San Francisco's Cow Palace. But it was the precision drill team that I believe first attracted me to the exciting teamwork and choreographies for groups that would later manifest in my dance. I also learned professional discipline while travelling the show circuit with my trusty steeds.

Something else had helped set the path for my dance career during high school, even though none of this was apparent then. It was my interest in medicine. My Mom was a registered nurse for 42 years and I was incessantly asking her questions. I was an honor roll student from the first one in 7th grade, so by my junior year in school I was offered a chance to enroll in an experimental class that was designed to prepare the students for a medical career. This was called the "Bio-Med Program," and included a couple dozen schools in California, with 28 kids in my class. We had no other class requirements except for P.E., which I detested and got out of as often as possible. The Bio-Med curriculum included English, math, and two hours of science each day. The latter was my favorite subject and I knew I would have a career eventually that had something to do with biology.

I graduated early and entered Sonoma State University where I studied botany, geology and medicinal herbs. Not having a concrete goal for myself, however, I drifted in and out of schools, including an 18-month Psych Tech program, for several years.

I had a few relationships that didn't last longer than 6 years, and passed through a lot of rebellious and experimental phases in early adulthood. Some of the more constructive of these was playing a trap drum set in an all-girl punk rock band, and later I picked up the bass guitar. After passing through a few pretty rough spots, I managed to get my act together again and almost immediately I re-met my present husband, Chuck. "Re-met," as we had dated briefly in high school and then we each went our separate ways for 17 years! Once we re-met we have hardly been apart. Right about that same time I began Jazzercise classes, which were the first organized movement classes I'd had for most of my adult lifetime.

Aerobic dance held my attention for about two years, and during that time I earned two Presidential Sports Awards, one for Aerobic Dance and one for Fitness. But I wanted more creativity in my workout. I was getting tired of following the instructor through our regimen of predictable "four more, three more, two more, that's it," steps. Then, as an answer to my prayers, I found a bellydance class being offered at a local rec center. I had never even seen a bellydancer before that I could recall, and had no clue what it was all about. I just thought it could be a fun and alternative exercise form so I enrolled.

From the first class, taught by Theresea (then known as Ravann,) I was hooked! I needed more than one class a week, so Ravann referred me to one of her troupe-mates from the original California-based Gypsy Caravan, Terrianne. Through Terrianne I met other teachers and I studied with all of them. I was insatiable. Terrianne showed us videos she had of famous dancers and the one that caught my eye was Suhaila Salimpour. By then I had subscribed to several oriental dance publications, and I noted her address at the Salimpour School of Dance, then in Los Angeles. I wrote to her and she wrote back! She said she'd be moving back to the San Francisco Bay Area and did I think there might be interest in starting a group class? The rest is history, and I studied with Suhaila and her Mom, Jamila, separately and together for over two years.

During that time I also kept up my studies at every opportunity with almost any seminar I heard of, as well as continuing regular weekly classes. I am fortunate to live in an area rich in seminars and festivals such as Rakkasah and Desert Dance Festival, as well as many smaller festivals and renaissance faires. I loved it all, and I tried everything. I was especially drawn to the American Tribal style of FatChanceBellyDance, and began studying with Carolena very early in my dance education, probably before Suhaila, and during that time as well. Because of geographical constraints, I have not been able to take more than one class a week in San Francisco, as it's over a 3 hour drive round trip for me. But over the last 7 years that still adds up to a lot of studying! Of course there were gaps, sometimes of several months, but I always return to Carolena's classes. She continues to be my only regular teacher at this present time and has been instrumental in my development as a dancer.

I also kept reading my magazines and I learned of many fascinating women I knew I just had to learn from. So I set my sights and followed through. One of the women that has had the greatest influence on my personal style has been Delilah. I have been to her Maui retreats twice, and was her staff person both years at the incredible "Inanna, Salome and the 7-Part Cabaret Routine," a very unusual retreat of self-exploration through dance held at Isis Oasis in California and co- facilitated by Lorraine Lafata of Boston's Goddess Dancing collective. I also sponsored Delilah in a class in the Bay Area in 1977.

Morocco of New York has helped me immeasurably over the years in my thirst for knowledge of the rituals and dances of the Mahgreb, and especially in my studies of Guedra. Rocky always has time to answer my questions and she has taught me more than she realizes. I owe a great deal to her.

I also began going to Mendocino Middle Eastern Music and Dance Camp and have tried not to miss it now for several years. I met and became enamored with Dalia Carella's passionate heart and have been a dedicated student of hers whenever I get near her! I take her classes every year at Rakkasah and at Camp when she's there.

There were two teachers that I was waiting for someone to sponsor in my area so I could attend a seminar with. It never happened, so I decided to sponsor them myself! My first seminar was held in June 1997 and featured Elizabeth Artemis Mourat and Laurel Victoria Gray teaching their "Gypsy Fire" workshop format. It was a tremendous success, and I so loved these women's styles I had both of them back in 1998, but separately. This time Laurel taught a two-day Central Asian seminar, concentrating on Uzbek and Persian dance, and Artemis taught two days of Turkish Rom. I must be sure to credit both of these women for helping me so much. I have become quite the Rom enthusiast and now perform my interpretations of Turkish Rom dancing. It speaks to me deeply and is a very natural form for me. I love it's rawness, it's power, it's spontaneity, pain and joy. And especially the qualities that Artemis calls "heart, guts and soul." This paragraph wouldn't be complete without thanking Eva Cernik, who taught two workshops for me here in Santa Rosa, and whom I learned a lot from about Turkish oryantal danse and Turkish Rom dance in a very short period of time!

These women inspired me to pursue my quest for knowledge of the Rom culture on my own as well, and it has become one of my special areas of interest. The universe was kind enough to bring a special friend into my life a couple years ago, Sani Rifati, who is Rom and from former Yugoslavia. Just knowing Sani and being able to participate in his celebrations and by being around he and his family, I have learned so much. Sani introduced me to his cousin, Esma Redzepova, the famous Queen of Romany Song this year. He translated while I conducted an interview with Esma, that will eventually appear in this magazine.

In order to delve deeper into understanding the dancers I admire, I began conducting interviews in 1995. I cannot tell you how much I have learned through this process and how much closer to each woman I've become as a result. The interviews I do are very in-depth and the interviewees are articulate and thorough in their responses. They take much preparation and thought, not to mention hours of writing, talking, taping and transcribing. Plus, I get to thoroughly pore over their extensive bios and support materials during my preparation of the questions I ask, and from those I learn an immense amount. I have found my conducting of interviews and writing of other articles to be an extremely valuable learning tool. Another thing the interview process has taught me is that each person is an individual and each person I admire has a deeply personal view on subjects pertaining to this dance. That in itself has been a turning point for me as far as being given "permission" to formulate my own views and to be less judgmental of others.

Eventually I took college level courses in ballet and modern dance. I feel these classes have helped me become a better all-around dancer, and I learned some great techniques that I incorporate today in my own bellydance classes I teach. I also completed a course in Anatomy and Physiology, which I feel is essential for teachers to know the basics of so they can be aware of how best to instruct their students. I consider myself a perpetual student and plan to continue my education forever.

I was a member of the original Gypsy Caravan for over three years, and I remember when I auditioned how petrified I was to be doing so, for all of the members at that time were teachers with whom I had studied! I learned invaluable lessons working with that troupe of professionals. Later I joined the Cultural Dance Company, with whom I perform now. We share current and ex- members of the Gypsy Caravan, but the CDC's focus is more on the presentation of traditional dances from various countries, including India, Egypt, Morocco, Turkey, Lebanon and Spain. We have enjoyed performances at universities, theatres, festivals and even our state's fair. One thing all three troupes I have danced with has in common is live music accompaniment, though we all are able to use recorded music when absolutely necessary.

As a soloist my first experiences learning to dance with musicians was gained primarily at the Grapeleaf Restaurant in San Francisco. Sausan, the owner, offers the dance community an indispensable service by providing an encouraging and supportive space weekly for students and professionals of all levels to gain practical experience working with some of the best of the Bay Area's bands. For over a year I made the trek monthly to dance with Light Rain, Susu and the Cairo Cats, Jazayer, Mary Ellen Donald and Mimi Spencer, the Coral Rose and many more. Now I am taking my own students there so they, too, can profit from this experience. I have also had the pleasure of dancing at several other San Francisco restaurants during my career as well.

About 4 years ago I began teaching regular classes at the rec center in Rohnert Park, California. These classes have evolved into four classes a week now, two dedicated to Tribal style and based on Carolena's teachings, and two Classical classes that I use information gleaned from all my teachers and especially elements of Jamila Salimpour's basic format. I have begun including some techniques I have learned from Delilah as well to help round out my class, especially in the intermediate and advanced levels.

I am also the proud director of The Arabian Spice Company student performing troupe. We rehearse after a weekday class and on Saturdays at my home studio. We have musicians and are growing in ideas and skills. It is a very rewarding thing to see your students become dancers. It is the most enriching "job" I have ever had. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I will be adding a separate tribal student troupe this year as well. My students and I perform at local festivals, fairs, parties, our annual student haflas, and wherever dancers are needed. This summer and early spring alone we had 8 shows in about 10 weeks. I feel as long as the troupe is presented as a student troupe to avoid misrepresentation as professionals, that performance skills cannot be gained in any other fashion. Participation in The Arabian Spice Co. (and in the future tribal troupe) is totally voluntary and no student is ever forced to perform. As an instructor, I am aware that this dance calls various people for various reasons and performance is not a necessary factor to continue studies.

Which brings me to tell you a bit about my philosophy as a teacher. I feel there is much, much more to learning, exploring and doing this art of oriental bellydance than a mere mechanical exercise of learning a series of steps. I do also feel strongly that in order to get to the "next level" of exploration one does need to know the basic steps very well, so they are automatically ingrained and no longer require conscious thought to execute. So don't get me wrong, in my beginning classes we drill basics and that's about all we do. We have history, cultural and costuming discussions, and I sell items such as books, videos, music and other materials to help my students broaden their awareness of this art form. I supply free handouts to my students on subjects from history to cymbals to breathing and strengthening suggestions, as well as handouts on resources where they can learn more. My students learn to play finger cymbals in the first or second class and we do play them almost every lesson. Feeling comfortable with the music and rhythms of the dance are an essential ingredient to self expression later.

In the intermediate/advanced classes we do a bit more of what I call "right-brained" techniques to help the dancers as they progress to find who they are in the dance, and to learn to improvise and be spontaneous. Yes, we do choreographies in the troupe, and occasionally in classes as learning tools. But they are not my focus as a teacher by any means. I value improvisation above anything, as I feel that is the core of this art, and so I try hard to help my students find the tools within themselves to successfully improvise. I encourage and help my students learn how to design their own choreographies as well by teaching them that it is no mystery to be left only to the professionals. All aspects of the dance belong to all of them if they wish.

I have been so rewarded by my students over the years. They have given me a gift unsurpassed in my life. Just yesterday one of them shared with me how much the dance has helped her become a happier, healthier person in all aspects of her life. She got it! They all seem to if they stick with it. Bellydance is truly a magickal transformation not to be dismissed lightly. I have seen evidence of it's power, not only in my own life, but now in those of my students as well. This art is, I feel, part of a bigger phenomenon that is awakening on our planet. This is a manifestation of the re- emergence of the Great Goddess consciousness, of balance between opposing forces. This is one path of thousands available for personal and spiritual growth. No one who does this dance for longer than a passing fancy is untouched. To me, this is truly exciting.

I teach any person who desires to learn, including women, men, boys or girls. The same goes for our student musicians. My only "qualification" for a student is sincere desire to dance or play music. Segregation or discrimination on the basis of age, race, religion, gender or sexual identity has no place in my class. I offer child discounts with a parent's simultaneous enrollment to encourage participation by family members. The youngest performer in our troupe has just turned 12. I feel a troupe is most beautiful, expressive and appealing when its members represent all ages, body types and levels of ability. That, to me, is a true celebration of the glory of our selves, our differences and our similarities. This is an important message to send today when we are too often bombarded by artificial standards of beauty that are not consistent with the natural beauty inherent in all of us.

I have been asked whether or not I find it conflicting to teach and perform both classical and tribal styles of the dance. I do not, and the notion held by many dancers that one needs to "pick a style" is strange to me. I am very clear when I am doing one or the other, or if I am doing a fusion of many dance styles. My costuming, music and movement vocabulary is appropriate for the style I am presenting. It has been interesting to note along the way the similarities as well as the differences in the various styles. I do traditional dances of the Middle East and North Africa, American classical, American tribal and Turkish Rom fusion styles, as well as interpretations that are none of the above on occasion. The similarity of the American classical and tribal styles I have found is in the basics. Carolena's tribal is rooted in Jamila's basic format, so they are not as removed as one may think at first glance. At the same time, the presentation is totally different. To me, this is exciting, challenging and very, very fun to explore. I love the way the various presentations make me feel as I do them.

Even as I prepare for each I am taken to a separate place. I feel completely different when I do my Guedra blessing as compared to my Lebanese debke as compared to my Turkish Rom as compared to my classical American veilwork as compared to my American tribal. I feel no need to deprive myself of any of these joys, so I refuse to stereotype or limit my repertoire. Certain styles are appropriate for certain venues and I embrace them all.

I have also enjoyed teaching seminars on occasion and hope to do more of these. My first was about Guedra and was held in 1993 in San Francisco. Since then, I have taught another Guedra workshop in Santa Rosa in 1997 and a seminar for Ellen Cruz at one of her annual Sebastopol Festivals on Turkish and Rom fusion dancing, also in 1997. This January 1999 I am pleased to be going to Florida to teach a two-day Tribal Bellydance seminar.

Funny the place the path of life takes you if you let it! I cannot imagine life without dance now. When I look back on the last 7 or so years, I see a great deal of positive change in my life that can be directly attributed to the healing power of this ancient contemporary art. Some of this has been personal and spiritual growth as well as physical and emotional healing. I have never been closer to ecstasy than while dancing, never been able to experience the Goddess so completely. Even though I took a round about way to get home, I am here to stay now. And I am fulfilled.

~end~